A Call to Conversation for White People

These are my thoughts as they streamed out this morning during my morning pages exercise. Typically, I don’t re-read morning pages, let alone publish them, but this felt like a worthwhile time to share. 

Like many other white people (privileged in that we live unafraid to leave our homes, drive our cars, walk down streets, live our lives) I too have been wondering what to do about racism, in light of the most recent horrible events in the U.S. 

I’ve been reading posts and articles, gathering insights and perspectives, about how my voice, my privilege, my actions can be used for beneficial change. I certainly don’t purport to be an expert on race, oppression, history or hold any other deeply informed intellectual analysis of this situation. However, by not looking at my role in this society, in the systems and institutions in place, and the benefits I gain from them, I’m complacent, and therefore, racist. And that’s not who I want to be. 

The videotaped murder of George Floyd by Minneapolis police officers makes it impossible to not think about racism. Mind you, all the other incidents of brutality, murder, oppression, incarceration, control, fear-mongering, fill-in-the-blank that exist in our North American society also make it impossible not to think about racism. And yet, things continue to continue as they have for many years, decades, centuries. 

I wonder, will this latest surge of awareness and good intentions die down after a week, or a month, only to flare up (briefly?) once the next George Floyd is murdered? When will we be moved to action to rewrite, redesign, redirect our future?

There’s much work to be done to remove the white entitlement from every system in North American society. 

I cannot imagine the fear Black men and women feel simply trying to go about their lives in the U.S. (and likely Canada as well), let alone the fear they feel for their children, the anger they must carry and keep smothered lest they be seen to fit a stereotype and therefore perpetuate it. 

I cannot imagine the fear of Latin American families as they approach the U.S. border, fleeing upheaval and chaos in their home countries, only to have their children pulled from their arms, and the parents deemed criminals and turned away. 

It’s easy to watch from Canada and critique the situation in the U.S., but that’s a) ignorant, and b) unhelpful. There are similarities between the Black experience in the U.S. and the systematic dismantling and oppression of indigenous populations in Canada. I cannot imagine the fear of having children kidnapped or forcibly taken from their homes and families and housed in degrading conditions hundred of kilometres away, only to be abused, broken and even die, and the ripples of trauma that creates in families and communities. It’s an ugly part of our collective Canadian story. 

As white people who want to do good and be seen as good, there’s fear of getting it wrong, or saying the wrong thing, or appearing to swoop in and be the white saviours, and that can hold us back. There’s also a narrative running in white minds about not being able to solve the whole problem, and not knowing where to start, so not starting at all. 

So I’ve come to this conclusion, which may change in the future as I continue to learn: The way forward for white people is to examine, educate, empathize and act. 

Examine

We must examine our own racism and privilege. 

My friend Gemma Stone wrote a helpful post and posed these questions (below), along with other resources in the comments of her original post:

For adults:

What media am I consuming and who is represented in it?

How do I respond when I witness overt and covert racism?

How has wanting to be good and likeable kept me from talking about racism?

How aware am I about the privilege I have? How do I feel about it?

What has stopped me from more fully engaging in anti-racism work?

For kids:

What’s your earliest memory around skin colour?

What do you understand about the power and privilege that comes from being white?

What have you not had to worry about because you are white?

What do you want the world to look like for all humans?

Educate

We must educate ourselves about the systems of oppression that we allow to exist, and from which we as white people benefit. It’s hard for us to see because we are in it and it is built for us.

A few informative sources: 

From KatyKatiKate: 5 Racist Anti-Racism Responses “Good” White Women Give to Viral Posts

A brutally helpful graphic: (Source? If you know, I’d love to give credit!)

This snappy and informative guide by @courtneyahndesign via Unapologetically Anxious Me Podcast.

Insightful training I participated in several months ago: Sacred Inclusion, created and led by the lovely Eva Cruz Pena.

A few highly recommended books that are on the way to may house so that I may learn and continue the conversation: 

Empathize

We must try to understand the experiences of those who are not in our shoes in order to fuel our call to change. 

Here is one deeply moving example.

Act 

We must take action to change what is not benefiting all members of our society, not only us. 

From Corinne Shutack on Medium: 75 Things White People Can Do for Racial Injustice

Resources for what to do as a bystander.

Vote for leaders who share a vision that’s intent on fixing these problems.

Consider running for office if you are that leader.  

Parting thoughts, for now

I feel that doing something is better than doing nothing, and we learn as we go. 

Start with what we know right now, do the best we can, and do better when we learn and know better. 

As white people, we need to claim what we WILL do about this, no matter how “small” or “large” that action is, and hold ourselves accountable to see that through, without getting distracted. How privileged we are to be distracted by cat videos, our roots showing and being Zoomed-out. 

The hierarchy of human value is vividly apparent right now and the divides between us are blatant. Brown kids in cages at the U.S.-Mexico border. Every Black person in America a suspect in a crime or eventual crime in the vicinity, simply because they are Black. Indigenous communities without access to clean drinking water, safe housing, appropriate healthcare. People of colour and non-dominant religious beliefs unable to avail themselves of the help and protection most of us take for granted. 

I’m called on to be a leader in some way, to add my voice to the change that’s needed. It’s my duty as someone who lives in privilege. Finding the thing is the thing now. 

What are the new models of our economy and institutions (government, education, health care, social services, economy) that truly serve and benefit all, not just the privileged? 

If we are looking at dismantling and redesigning our institutions that are currently founded on patriarchy, misogyny, racism, colonialism, oppression, separation, capitalism, we must be willing to let go of the way we each benefit from them and be willing to be uncomfortable for the sake of others.

The pandemic has shown us that this is both critical AND possible. Most of us with any amount of privilege have put aside at least some personal comforts for the benefit of others to keep them healthy and preserve our healthcare system, along with other essential services. 

We can do this. We just have to choose to.  

I don’t know the answers or the models or what the new thing is that’s needed, but sometimes knowing what it is not is a good enough place to start.

Right now, I know what we have isn’t working.

Right now, I have only questions and curiosity and a willingness to learn. Maybe my questions aren’t even the right questions, and maybe I won’t know that until I ask them. 

My invitation is to open and forward the conversation to help create the vision for what we want our society, our institutions, our systems to be in the future, and then to bring that vision to reality. 

I would love to learn from you and with you. Please share your resources, insights and ideas for addressing this huge problem. I know that by solving the problem of systemic racism, we will also find ways to solve other collective problems in the world, including poverty, climate change and all forms of oppression.

Individually and collectively, we can make a difference.